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Friday, May 05, 2006

must...go...to bed...

ugh it's eleven past eleven. i just got home from my stupid-but-necessary job and ate some salad and now, having entered all my meals for the day in fitday, i need to go to bed before i do something stupid like go eat some chocolate chips. for God's sake, why on earth do i still have these in my house? it's like i'm TRYING to do myself in!

baby had her dr.s appointment today. she had three shots. i HATE when my poor babies have to get shots! and she screamed! poor thing; this afternoon her leg swelled a little and was red and she was really warm. she woke up from her nap screaming like she's never screamed before in her short life so far. so i gave her baby tylenol (thank you God that i stopped at target on the way home!) and nursed her and rocked her and nursed her and rocked her and burped her and rocked her and FINALLY she fell asleep. i called hubby from work around 8 and he said she was still asleep! poor thing must have tuckered herself out. neither of the other girls had reactions with shots so this was a new, scary thing. on top of that, the dr. said she detected a tiny faint heart murmur (!!!) so now i'm freakin out that if she cries too hard her hearts gonna let go. jeez, who needs the stress?!

you know, i pray every day that God keeps our baby safe and healthy. of course, i pray that about all our children, but for some reason i just have a hangup about baby r. i have trouble seeing her as older, like maybe we're not going to have her for very long. i know this is the stupid neurosis of a sleep-deprived mother but it's scary anyway. it makes me just want to hold her and not let go until she turns 30. :)

anyway, can't wait to step on the scale on sunday morning. i'm not doing well at staying under 2000 calories a day, but pretty close, and i think my clothes fit better. i stress the word THINK. :) we'll see!

ok i'm off to bed.
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